The Curse of the Goddess
by Ava Chanel
Summary: She blessed me with courage but cursed me with love. Noel/Serah drabble, spoilers.


**A/N:** _A short and bittersweet drabble. Contains a hint of spoilers. _

**Summary:** _She blessed me with courage but cursed me with love._ Noel/Serah drabble with spoilers from Noel's perspective.

**The Curse of the Goddess**

I am your chosen.

Blessed by all your gifts.

I followed the path you led me down.

I never complained.

I never gave up.

I would fight until the bitter end.

Sacrifices I would be willing to make, including that of my own life.

If I could save many, then I would not be afraid to die.

You showed me the way, guided me. When I was lost, you sent your blessing and saved me.

Then, you sent me to her.

Protect her. It was simple.

Something I have done before.

I could protect her. I would protect her.

I would help her, I would get her to your other chosen; her sister.

Together, we would save the future. Together, we would fight.

You blessed me. You showed me the world I fought to save. You showed me beauty and happiness.

I met so many people, so many lives I needed to protect. You gave me a reason to continue to fight, no matter the dangers.

You allowed me to make new friends, find more purpose.

You cured my loneliness; you called it a blessing. I called it a miracle.

And then finally, you gave me love. Only, by the time you allowed me to realize this gift, you cursed me.

Gone were your blessings.

Gone were your gifts.

Gone was your comfort and your guidance.

And in it's place, you granted me with a loneliness worse than before. You gave me an emptiness that finally broke my spirit. You managed to destroy me; your chosen.

Love, in all it's glory, lay dead in my arms, the life gone, never to return.

Numb. Empty. My purpose snatched from me. Failure replaced devotion. Strength replaced with hopelessness.

Heaven became a myth. Happiness no longer existed in a world without her. A future without her was bleak, a future I did no longer want to save.

The world crashed upon me and it did not matter, it did not phase me. The love was gone, the light in her eyes never to shine again. The lips never to smile. The heart never to beat. The skin no longer warm. The cheeks never to blush. The fingers never to tangle with my own.

Love lay dead in my arms and I only just realized that you had cursed me from the beginning.

I was never meant to save her. I was never meant to have her. She was never to be mine. She belonged to you now and you have left me helpless and abandoned.

Love, once so beautiful, was dead. Love had left me. Love had shut her eyes to me and would not open them again.

She was still beautiful, even though she lay still against my chest, even though my tears stained her porcelain cheeks. Asleep. She looked to be asleep. But I could not wake her. I could not save her.

I could not protect her.

I could not save the future. I could not save the beauty of the world you once showed me.

The Goddess' chosen. I ask you, what is my purpose if I have failed in every regard? Was I a toy? A pawn? To tease me with all these wonders and then so cruelly take them away?

I would have given my life for her. Why did you not take me instead? I would not be missed, for no one was alive that would miss me. She was loved, she was dear. The world would be a more desolate place without her.

Goddess, Etro. Where is the love you promised me? Where is the life you owe me?

What am I to do?

Do I continue to fight? Do I continue to try?

I want to save her. I need to save her. She must be brought back. If I fight your battle, will you bring her back to me?

Will you keep her safe and sound until I can?

Treat her well. Keep her sweet. And tell her I will come for her. Tell her I will bring her back. Remind her of the wonders she fought to protect and do not let her know of failure or sadness. Protect her, keep her strong and faithful. Tell her I won't be long and tell her I will fight in her stead.

Tell her…

that I love her, because I could not…

**-fin**

**A/N:** _Feedback as always, is welcomed. :)_


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